Returning to wholeness

Women Returning to Wholeness

About Goddess Revealed

Ina’s Why

Philosophy and Approach

About Goddess Revealed

In my counselling and healing work it is my greatest passion and deepest honour to walk with you on a journey of exploration. This journey of “becoming who you really are”, will reveal your inner Goddess while you step into your power and strength.

I appreciate how this quote by Marianne Williamson captures the essence of the process I strive to facilitate.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be…”

From my personal experience and from the many years of working with women, I know that there are times in our lives, where we need help or support to reconnect or rediscover who we really are and want to be in our life.

Each one of us is brilliant, gorgeous and talented in our own unique and wonderful way.

And yet, we can find ourselves asking, Who am I to be fabulous?

At one point, you knew what if felt like to love yourself just the way you are.

You were born a beautiful Goddess.

And then life happened. Even if you were blessed with the most loving and kind parents; circumstances and events would have conspired to instill doubts in your knowing that you’re already good enough.

Somewhere along the line, most of us internalize the notion that we would be loved more, if we were different. Often we learn that it’s not who you are but what you do that is loved.

Imagine that every time something causes a shift in your behavior and your perception of self, a little bit of mud gets splattered on you.

Not only do you receive messages growing up, society and the media bombard you with communications aimed at changing who you are.

You’re told

  • how you should look
  • what makes you attractive
  • what makes you a good mother
  • what makes you a good daughter
  • when you qualify as a “good wife”

When enough messages or “mud” cling to you, your inner Goddess becomes obscured.

It’s like a part of you has gotten covered up. You lose confidence and connection to your inner wisdom.

Somewhere along the line it becomes YOUR job to take care of everyone and everything. You feel compelled to make sure others are happy, even if it means giving up a little piece of your own happiness.

Becoming disconnected from yourself shows up in mind and body.

Because I use a mind / body approach in my work, you will not only be able to heal and let go of issues that are weighing you down mentally; you will also release them physically.

Marianne Williamson’s quote about our deepest fear continues like this:

We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”

 

 

 

With my work here at “Goddess revealed…becoming who you really are”, I hope to be your guide as you heal what needs healing so you can let your Goddess shine fully and live your life from that place of courageous, exhilarating authenticity… the place of being who you really are.

 

 

 

 Ina’s Why

I believe that often our passions, gifts and callings grow out of our life experiences. I am passionate about helping women heal their relationship with food, their bodies and themselves because of my own learning and my life journey.

Early childhood circumstances saw me being raised by grandparents who were war survivors. Today I know that they were well intentioned and just doing the best they could. But growing up, I interpreted the regular physical punishments, strict rules and continuous criticism as proof that there was something wrong with me. Certainly just being me wasn’t only not good enough, it seemed to trigger unpredictable reactions of wrath.

I started to use food to cope with my emotional overwhelm in my early teens. For the next 1.5 decades nobody would notice my struggles because my weight remained fairly constant and just slightly above normal. While I was trying to control my anxiety and depression, nobody witnessed my purging, my over exercising or my distorted perception of my body; nor was anyone aware that I battled feelings of shame and despair while I felt held hostage in a cycle of disordered eating.

It wasn’t until I started practicing and studying dance movement therapy and somatic psychotherapy that I felt connected to my body. And only in this place of connection was I able to heal from emotional eating / bulimia.

Today, I practice somatic psychotherapy which integrates mind and body, because I experienced powerful transformation and I continue to witness similar healing in my daily work with clients.

I have learned that the fastest way out of your head and away from the chorus of contrasting “voices” is to get into your body, especially if you struggle with any form of addiction.

Because I know the pain of disordered eating and the often associated body shame, I have chosen to specialize in helping women heal their relationship with food and their bodies.

I also have intimate knowledge of the journey of learning to love myself just the way I am. I am well acquainted with the mindset of trying to be “perfect” or feeling responsible for the well-being of those I love. I’m more than familiar with being driven by the longing to be loved and the desire to feel “good enough.”

Sadly, trying to be the best mother or the perfect wife did not create the happy family I dreamed of. The process of having to learn to lovingly forgive myself and others for the mistakes we made was arduous. It felt like an impossible task to try to come to terms with the fact that even doing ones best didn’t stop pain from touching those I love the most.

While navigating this landscape of grief, loss and forgiveness, I was blessed with amazing teachers and healers whose support and guidance was a great gift.

Not all gifts that life bestows upon us however are easily recognized as such. Have you ever felt like saying “I’ll return this, thank you very much. Don’t really want to have this experience?”

That is how I felt when years after my separation; I fell in love with a woman. I felt like everything I knew and had learned to love and accept about myself was turned upside down. I didn’t like this new part of me that had been hiding in the shadows.

It brought up all kinds of questions. Who am I? The voices in my head were working overtime, sharing various opinions…none of them very helpful. My family was in shock and also not very helpful.

In the end I learned the most important lesson of all. Becoming who I really am, revealing my inner Goddess and allowing her to shine, is an inside job.

My Goddess revealed loves both men and women and she’s not a perfect mother, even though she adores her children and grandchildren.

My Goddess is a “perfectionist in recovery” and a bit of a control freak at times.

She’s also a loyal friend, dancer, animal lover, world traveler, bird watcher and devourer of books. Grounded in my spiritual belief system, I’m incredibly grateful for everything I have become and for all the gifts the Universe has bestowed or sometimes thrust upon me.

My Goddess revealed is also a dedicated healer, counsellor and intuitive. I feel very blessed that my extensive professional training and the school of life allow me to follow my calling and do this work.

I am passionate about offering my wisdom and my gifts to women who are on the journey of healing their relationship with themselves. I aim to be your cheerleader and guide while you heal and let go of what no longer serves you, so you can proudly and lovingly reveal your Goddess and claim who you really are.

 

Note: green highlight – link to philosophy and approach

 

 

 

My Philosophy and approach

Research shows that positive change and healing can happen most effectively and fully when we consider the human being as a whole.

It is when we address all the levels of your existence, your mind, your body, your emotions and your spirit that you can connect to your Core Self.

The Core Self is the place in you that contains your inner voice, your truth and your authenticity.

When you are connected to your inner wisdom and your true self, you tap into a consistent source of internal support and stability. From this place, you can live your life with a sense of self-worth, expansion and well-being.

For our counselling work together, that means we will not just talk about or analyze a problem you need support with, but we will take a look at how this is affecting all of you.

How are you being affected mentally and emotionally?

Often, clients complain of feeling dissatisfied, empty and hollow even though on the surface their life is “going well”

You may have a job, a family, friends, and money, and yet you don’t feel seen or heard and feel more and more disconnected from your Soul.

In our work together, you will be able to change your story. You will no longer be a prisoner of old, distorted and limiting ideas you learned about yourself in the past.

Instead, you will have the opportunity to build an authentic, coherent interior narrative that reflects who you are today and who you want to become. This empowers you to change how you view and react in the world, especially in relationships.

You will be able to move from living your life the way “you think you should” so others approve and love you, to living your life connected to what is true and right for you.

Once we know what you are feeling and thinking we want to take a look at:

How is your problem manifesting in your body?

Your body tells a story with how you breathe, what kind of tension you carry and how you connect with energy.

Current scientific research in the field of psychobiology has shown that feelings from our past are stored in the body and unconsciously impact how we feel and how we behave.

When you are confronted with a stressful situation or your mind thinks thoughts that bring up anxiety, frustration, anger, fear or sadness, your body responds with tension.

Tension blocks the flow of energy and prevents you from feeling good.

Have you noticed that sometimes you are so used to having a tight area in your body, that it has pretty much become a part of you and how you feel?

Maybe you are used to having stiff shoulders and neck when you are stressed. For some, this constant tension actually impacts their posture and how they carry themselves. You may have seen people with a barrel chest or with permanently hunched shoulders.

This is a typical result of tension becoming what is called a “holding pattern.” Holding patterns not only block the energy in your body, they become storage areas for your feelings of grief or anger, anxiety or depression.

It’s hard to feel joyful in a body that is all stiff and tired and heavy.

In our work together, I will gently guide you to bring awareness to these areas.

By using breath and the body as a gateway you will not only release the muscle tension. Because your mind and body are completely interconnected, you will be able to successfully let go of long-standing negative thinking patterns.

This process will allow your body to expand, making space physically and emotionally to connect with your vitality and feelings of joy and well-being.

Furthermore, with increased awareness, your self-esteem will grow.

From this place of authenticity and connection to your inner voice, you will be able to become who you really are.

 

 

 

 

Burnaby sex therapist and North Vancouver intimacy and relationship counsellor Ina Stockhausen, anxiety therapy for women, divorce counselling, therapy for low self esteem, sex therapy relationship counselling, eating disorders therapist, treatment for food addiction, post traumatic stress counselling